e noho rā Aotearoa / Goodbye New Zealand


My family and I came to New Zealand to fulfill our dreams and to allow our children to grow up in a beautiful and safe surrounding. Therefore we gave up everything. Unfortunately someone had other plans. When I once will look back at this time what will I remember?

First of all and most important I found my way back to our Lord. Through all this suffering, He was always there for me, He gave me strength, He never let me down, He always gave me hope and He loves me with all my imperfection. And therefore I am so grateful.

What else? I have learnt a lot about what is important in life. Things that are all simple and they are for free. Probably you already know them. But transferring it from knowing into acting is something different. In my case it took a while and it needed a lot of suffering. If you haven’t tried them so far, start and see what happens. You’ll be surprised. Be patient in affliction, stay peaceful when the whole world seems to be against you, be more kind to others, smiles make others smile too, giving is better than taking, stay humble in a selfish and greedy world or just be grateful about what is God doing for us. I also put love fully into my center. Even though I was deceived, used and treated by Satan in the worst way I will never give up believing in love, because it is the answer to everything.

The hardest thing I had to learn is that you have to accept things you cannot change; sometimes you just have no control about your life anymore. You have to let go, otherwise overthinking will lead to sadness. I’d rather choose to be happy again. And the journey isn’t over yet. I still have lots to learn: being not angry about what has been done to my kids and to me is still not easy; my next and probably biggest step is to forgive and to trust again. Will I ever forget? Hopefully I can forgive someday.

One sermon by my church I will never forget. Where is the difference between a Christian who is not acting in His way and a non believer? There is non. It would be the easy way to ask why? Why did God choose me as a father and let this happen? How can somebody be so cruel and cold-hearted and do this? It would be the easy way to blame or to judge others. But this is the wrong way. He sees everything and it is only up to Him to judge. He has a plan for everyone; and this plan might be greater than you might think now. So I will put all my trust and faith in Him and will follow His way, even if it is the narrow way. I pray and I know that He will take care of my kids and family. Maybe His plan will one day lead me back to New Zealand. We’ll see. All I know is that one chapter has been closed, and another chapter opens. It is not written yet; I’ll do my very best to make it a good one.

I would like to take this opportunity also to thank all those wonderful people around the world who accompanied me through this hard time. Those wonderful people I mean know who are meant. Thank you for all of your support, your help, your prayers, your laughing, for drying my tears, for listening, for putting a smile back on my face, for your hugs, your words and your teachings – sometimes they were a slap in the face at the right time. I do believe that there is no coincidence in this life. It was destined that our journeys crossed each other. Thank you.

If I can give you just a few advices, it would be this: be you. Stay on the right path. Even if that means that people might turn their back on you. It also means the right people will support you on your way. Maybe one day you find yourself in a similar situation where you think there is no way out and you won’t survive; maybe loved ones also have hurt you, you have financial problems, someone may be sick, your dreams have been burst. Then start talking to Him and read His words. Prayers for yourself or for others can be so powerful. This changed me and in the end it saved my life. Maybe yours as well.

Last there are a few things I have to tell all Kiwis. You have such a beautiful country with so many diverse landscapes and biotopes. I first visited New Zealand seven years ago. Even within that rather short time you could see the change. This change I mean is not a good one. To be honest I was shocked at first sight; and the longer you live in this country you see all the wounds that has been done by mankind. Wounds that can clearly be seen if you walk with eyes wide open and don’t close them before reality. E.g. forests are gone or dead trees everywhere you look outside the National Parks; polluted rivers mainly caused by using poison to get rid of the predators instead of trying alternatives; increasing the conventional agriculture to satisfy basically foreign countries; selling houses and the most beautiful places to rich people who even don’t want to live here with the outcome that one day this country doesn’t belong to New Zealanders anymore; allowing rich people to get a visa straight away while honest and hardworking people who really want to make an effort and bring an advantage to this country are being sent away. Wake up. It is your country. Money’s not everything. A normal family, for example, can no longer afford to buy a house. All the tourists bringing all the needed money come to New Zealand because of the unique and amazing nature. What do you think will happen if the nature in this country will be destroyed? Some things are going wrong in this country. Some things to think about, isn’t it?!

My journey in New Zealand ends, but life goes on. All my tears won’t heal the pain, but life has to go on. After all I have found my purpose in life. I will tell everybody, who is interested, how great God is and spread His good news.

I wish you all the best for the future and I will never forget you.
We’ll see each other again – if not in this life then in our next life.
Goodbye and may God bless you.

Winters ending


First warm sun rays bring closer season spring.
First white legs that are brave for a swim.
Wind’s thriving through the hair, goosebumps on the skin.
Winter’s still there, can you feel him?

Jandals are squeezing through the sand.
Do you want to take my hand?
The smell of fish is in the air, hear the children’s laughter?
And spring is already there, what are you running after?

Males are chasing females,
humans and birds.
Lord, thank you for the seasons,
thank you for this wonderful world.

Respect for life and nature

NZ Flag Moving to another country is feeling like beginning something new. Leaving the past behind and getting the chance to start your life again. Moving to New Zealand is not only about that. Firstly, it’s about the beautiful landscape that this wonderful country has. There’s something spiritual about this land. I am not talking only about the obvious signs where you’ll find visible Māori culrure; Māori are the indigenous people of New Zealand. There are also some unique places where you can feel that spiritual awareness too.

My favourite place is in the town where I am currently living in at the moment. It is just a tree settled peacefully next to the beach. But to me it is not just a tree. Beacon of Nature To me it is a ‘Beacon of Nature’ and its decleration as a natural heritage is well deserved. By just looking at this tree with all its strong branches, its strong roots and its beautiful colours or by just touching its bark you can feel the energy from the tree, flowing around and in you. You feel that you are one with nature again. A feeling that most of us – including me – used to have during our childhood but have lost a long time ago. I am grateful to have felt that feeling again.

It’s about the people in this wonderful country. There’s nothing unusual about meeting people you might say. But here it’s about the way you’ve been met and treated: with respect, with a smile and without any prejudices. People And it doesn’t matter if you are poor or rich, old or young, ordinary or beautiful, disabled or in shape, black or white. Life is not about earning heaps of money, jumping to the next level of your career, driving a fancy car or complying with the beauty ideal, it’s about regaining respect for life.

Why don’t we make an effort anymore, to overcome the wall of prejudice to see what is really behind it? A human with all his fears and longings, all of which are quite similar worldwide, but the experiences can be so diverse and exciting that you can only learn from them.

And I want to learn. I want to learn how to become one with nature and respect every aspect of life. Taking care of nature and giving a little smile cost nothing and can still bring about so many positive effects.

NO to seismic blasting in New Zealand

An urgent call:

According to Greenpeace New Zealand the biggest seismic blasting vessel in the world has entered New Zealand waters. It came for no other reason than to search for oil.

Not only to talk about climate change issues due to oil usage but it’s also harmful to whales, dolphins and other marine life. The ship fires massive seismic blasts creating shockwaves that penetrate the ocean and the seafloor every ten seconds, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, for weeks and months on end.

Whales and dolphins depend on their hearing to survive, whether it’s for locating prey or predators, or communicating with mates. Without any hearing they cannot survive.

This all is going on in an area stretching between Napier and Kaikoura – an area with pristine waters which is inhabited by thousands of whales and dolphins.

Please sign at Stop seismic blasting